What a night ...

So I want to first start by saying that I love my family and would never change who I married for the world. But I need to vent and express how very difficult it is to be a part of a blended family and step-mom. Ever since the day my step-son Brad moved in last year, we have clashed. Part of this issue for most of last year was pregnancy hormones (that's my excuse and sticking to it).

But since Brianna has been in our lives, I have made every attempt to make the situation livable. I think that I am very supportive and have allowed him to be a part of my whole family, including my parents and grandparents.

After a few good weeks and moving a few steps ahead, we took 10 steps back. This has been the cycle in our household for the whole year he has been living with us.

It started out as a discussion of taking things with out asking permission. By mid-conversation he felt the need to call me a racist. If anyone knows anything about me and my family, I am far from racists. I have dealt with this concept most of my childhood. I grew up with a grandfather that was not accepting (and I would call him a racist) of people with a different ethnicity or race. Through out my childhood, I felt that I was judged based on the beliefs of my grandfather. As I grew into adulthood, I knew what was right way to treat people. People of all colors should be treated as equals. I do not judge people by the color their skin but by whats inside them. I would hope that I am not judge by the way I look but how I treat others.

So going back to the argument tonight ... I don't know where this came from. Brad does not know anything about me besides the fact that I married his father. How can teenagers these days be so disrespectful. I think that all of the issues that we have had boil down to disrespecting your parents/step parents because of the sacrifice that they make to provide for them.

I just hope and pray that as he grows into adulthood, he will see the wrong he has done to me and regret the way he treated me.

Here is to a better tomorrow ....

2 years ago today ...

Today we celebrate the birth of our twins, Matthew and Madison. I have spent most of the day reflecting on what a blessing they have been to our lifes...

I am so blessed to have these 2 wonderful children. They love me so much and I love them twice as much in return. I could not imagine what my life would be with out them.

There are days I wonder why the Lord has given me such a handful. How can I handle 2 infants at the same time while working a full time job? Many days I thought I would never make it to the next day. It has not been an easy 2 years. Not only have we had to care for twins, but we have gone through a lot as a family. I think that all of our struggles have made me a stronger wife and mother.

We spent the day together just like every weekend. We really did not do much because Bill was working this weekend. We are planning a birthday party next weekend with our family. We will have to go shopping for them some time this week. I am not sure what we will be getting them. I think we were going to be looking for some thing they can play with outside. Maybe a scooter or a sand box. I guess we will have to see.